When A Child Doesn't Want to Fly

My wife, Mary, and I (both pilots) have treated learning to fly exactly the same as learning to drive, when it came to our kids. When our son turned 17, he took flight lessons, and earned his private within 4 months. He flew into Oshkosh that same year, and is now 4th-year ROTC at the University of Iowa.

Our daughter is now 17, and we have had great difficulty finding proper flight instruction for her at our new home. CFIs are scarce here, and rental planes even scarcer -- but we've persisted, and have finally found a suitable instructor who is willing to fly to the island to give her lessons.

So, yesterday I let her fly us back from lunch. She did great, doing everything from taxiing, to departure, to climb, to navigating. She held course and altitude perfectly, for an hour, and then descended into downwind effortlessly -- where I took over.

After we landed, we discussed her situation. She has never shown a burning desire to fly, so we wanted to make sure that she wouldn't get half-way through her training and then quit -- so we asked her point blank: "Do you want to learn to fly?"

Her answer stunned me: "Not really."

Yikes. She went on to say that, although flying is fun, it's not a huge passion of hers, and she wouldn't spend the money, if it were up to her.

Well, it IS up to her, and I thanked her for her honesty. I also told her that this is a truly once-in-a-lifetime opportunity -- no one will EVER give her a pilot's license again -- and she responded that she knew that...

This is really bothering me. She has flown with us since birth, and is a natural. I have a sinking feeling that in 5, 10 or 20 years she will be kicking herself for not taking advantage of this opportunity -- but I don't want to press the issue. Flying is simply not something to take lightly, and I don't want her taking flight lessons because it's something her parents want her to do. She has to truly want to fly, or (IMHO) she could end up hurting herself or others.

But I also want to make sure this is really her logical decision, and not just some "spur of the moment" dumb teenage shoot-from-the-hip statement that she will truly regret later on. I don't know what to say to her, now. All I can see is a huge lost opportunity for her.

I know this is a common situation -- I've heard guys talk about it -- but I've never dealt with it, personally. What did you guys do, when you discovered that your kids were indifferent toward flying? Did any of them eventually come around?

Also, are any of you guys children of pilots, who were given a similar (lost) opportunity, and then later became pilots? What would you say to her today?

Thanks for any and all advice!
 
Our daughter is now 17
That's not in the "child" range. The thread title is all wrong; it should be: "How do I handle my angst when my teenage daughter doesn't want to learn to fly on my dime."

This is really bothering me.
Learning to fly is about as practical as learning to play a musical instrument well. Both can give pleasure, but neither is essential to a living a full life.
 
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